Tuesday, May 1, 2007

So obviously desperate, so desperately obvious...

"News cycles often are not a reflection of fact. Instead, they are merely a reflection of emotion and popular opinion."- The Motley Fool

I get up at an ungodly hour in the morning to go to the gym, and while I have the TV on I'll still catch some of the infomercials for "Girls Gone Wild." After years of watching these commercials with black bars over all the fun parts, I downloaded on to see what all of the ballyhoo was aboot. As far as I can tell it's nothing but a bunch of drunk girls, marginally attractive at best, licking on each other and touching themselves. And while there's nothing wrong with that (and dare I say, it should be encouraged), it's hardly worth $19.95.

The only thing worse than walking up the stairs behind someone with a big old cottage cheese ass, is walking up the stairs behind someone with a big old cottage cheese ass who themselves is walking up the stairs behind someone with a big old cottage cheese ass. It's just too much cottage cheese and too much ass for one man to handle.

I'm all for calling public figures on hypocrisy when it comes to saving the Earth and global warming (along the "do as I say, not as I do" tip), but let's keep some perspective. There's a world of difference between G.Q. Smoothe or MC $tereoType using private airplanes for frivolous uses...and a PRESIDENTIAL CAMPAIGN needing one to transport a staff of hundreds. All the douchebag radio shows are criticizing the Dem candidates because they didn't carpool to the debate. Imagine what they would be saying if Hillary Clinton missed it altogether because Jet Blue cancelled all flights out of JFK? And if even if it was "frivolous," that's not an excuse to leave all the lights on in the house or ask them to double bag your laundry detergent when it has a handle on it.

The ladies come to see you if your name still rings a bell. They give you damn near nothin' and they'll say they knew you well. So you tell 'em you'll remember, but they know it's just a game. And along the way their faces all begin to look the same. And when you stop to let 'em know you got it down, it's just another town along the road.

I had mentioned how surprising some of the songs on your iPod can be, and while I was comfortable with the on Ryan Cabrera song, apparently a few Hawthorne Heights songs stuck their way on it too. There's no excuse for that one. I'm sorry.

I've been peaking to see what MSNBC's been airing for a morning show. Last week, they slowly tried to turn what they were showing into the show they had cancelled a few weeks ago. I only caught five minutes of it yesterday (different host from last week), but in those five minutes I saw a person portraying a hurtful and negative stereotype of Italian-Americans (including using the word "gay" a few times, thus making it a homophobic diatribe as well). Then they reported on a story aboot a man who had sex with a hedgehog. Like I said, I only watched for five minutes. But when the NBC employees recently were all oh so proud of the journalistic integrity of the news division (as reported on NBC), I wonder if this was what they were talking aboot.

There's a big difference between talking to yourself and thinking out loud.

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